Today has been a rather simple, but tad offbeat day for me. My girls left this morning for a road trip with Andy, their dad, and while I was glad the three of them were able to go somewhere for much needed time together, I found myself nostalgic over past trips we had taken as a family of four. So, my mood began to waiver between being "okay" and "not so okay". I decided that I needed to hop in the car and just go do something. Since I am taking a road trip to Texas later this week, I'm really not wanting to spend any money. So, retail therapy was out of question. I decided to simply drive to a local produce stand and pick up some fresh produce and look at plants.
A friend of mine had been talking earlier this week of having had a delicious tomato sandwich, and my mouth has been watering ever since. I love homegrown tomatoes. I picked out my loot at the produce place, drove back into town, grabbed an iced tea from Sonic, and came home to make my sandwich. Just the simpleness of it was divine! Although I still am missing my girls, I know they are having fun, and so I decided to just shift my focus and enjoy a simple day at the hacienda. I drank my iced tea and ate my tomato sandwich, relishing the fact that I am a southern gal at heart and even though I can do without the blazing heat, I love summer in the south. I have a good novel I am reading, so I got that out and read until I felt sleepy. I was wanting to give into the nap, but kept thinking "I should do....", or "This really needs to be done..." when I realized....today can be about ME. I am missing my family, and it's okay for me to just do what I want to do and not what I "have" to do. Which is lingo for "Tracy took the nap".
I'm up now, and planning a supper meal of simple fresh veggies. This is something I can't really do when my girls are here. They aren't that crazy about all the veggies that I am, and they definitely want meat. I'm a carnivore too, don't get me wrong. But I realized that I can enjoy a simple meal the way that "I" want it for tonight. Part of being single is learning to readjust my thinking and find ways to deal with the times I am alone. It's a simple concept really, and yet so hard to do.
As it nears supper time, I'm realizing that I made it through the day alone. This isn't my first day alone, but every time that I do it, and I realize that I'm okay, I feel good inside.
I'm going to prepare my veggies soon, and then, to make up for the self-indulgent nap I took, I need to tackle the jungle when it cools off. "Jungle" is codeword for my backyard. I hate mowing. Well, I used to like it when I had a riding mower. But these push mowers are a different story. Oh well. I'll at least feel like I accomplished a task.
Things I am grateful for today:
1. Tomato sandwiches.
2. Good books.
3. Riding mowers. Oh wait, I don't have one.
4. My niece. Who I just found out wants to take the roadtrip with me and Casie to Texas this week. That's pretty cool....she's pretty cool.
